Dear Woman, I’m Not Your Enemy


Dear woman I’m not your enemy

And deep down you know that it’s true

Dear woman I’m not your enemy

The only enemy you’re fighting is you


Don’t hang on to your man for dear life

When I come into full view

Don’t snarl at me in spite

For something I didn’t even do


You seem to believe I am a threat

Just by my sheer existence

And you think your death grip on your man

Will ensure he keeps his distance

But dear woman if you weren’t so consumed

By the figments of your imagination

You’d realise that your dignity

Isn’t even worth an altercation


You’d realise that a committed man

Doesn’t require any restraint

And that you playing Sherlock Holmes

Will not keep him a Saint

You’d realise that if you have to resort

To watching his every move

You’re wasting valuable years playing detective

When you could’ve already found a better dude.


Dear woman I’m not your enemy

So don’t get angry when you see a sistah dressed up

Don’t start getting loud, outrageous and rude

Or constantly walk pass me to flaunt your stuff


We were blessed by God with a gift

More powerful than our good looks

It’s more than what’s between our legs

Or our ability to get into a man’s good books


We hold the seeds of great nations

And can determine a better tomorrow

By the children we rear with these hands

And how we encourage through sweat and sorrow


Whether it be a leader or the house help

We have the power to assert our presence

To create a tidal wave of change

And leave indelible marks in our absence


So I’m not your enemy dear woman

We need not fight each other for attention

I’d rather celebrate what makes us uniquely beautiful

Our grace, our style, our moves, our complexion


Dear woman I’m not your enemy

And deep down you know that it’s true

Your fight with me is pointless

‘Cause you’re fighting the very reflection of you


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I’m Not Beautiful But I’m Worth It

If by ‘beauty’ people imagine a woman with long lustrous hair, blue eyes, fair skin, a generous bosom, petite waistline, perfectly sculpted ass, beautifully toned legs and immaculate toes then, my dear friend, by those standards, I am nowhere close. I will not look to categorise the level of attractiveness that I possess because that would be an effort in futility nor will I use the pitiful line that ‘Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’. Hell, I am the beholder and you know what? I am freaking fabulous.

My hair is not long and lustrous but I understand the curl pattern, bounce and nature of it to the point that I can expertly smooth it, wrap it, braid it or let it loose in all its natural kinky glory. My eyes are not blue. In fact, the hint of brown in it is so light that it’s almost unnoticeable but talk to me long enough and you’ll see that my eyes are as animated as my movements, flashing with passion and shining with youthful vibrancy. I am not fair-skinned – I’m black. Every inch of me cloaked in this dark mahogany-tinted silky skin that is both unblemished and soft. It’s so smooth and pliable that I have neither wrinkle nor cellulite.

My bosom is not generous but it isn’t small either. It’s just right for my frame – perky, rounded and just enough to be a welcome handful for my partner. My waistline stands squarely on top of my hips, both of which are beautifully proportioned and attractively set. My ass may not be big but it can bounce sexily and rhythmically to any beat that I command it to march to and my legs and toes may not have the privilege of seeing the inside of a spa once a week but they can kick the life out of an SOB who tries to disrespect this temple.

So how am I able to describe such simple physical characteristics with such loving, confident and proud statements? That’s because I know that whether or not I’m deemed ‘beautiful’ by anybody’s standards, I am certainly worth it.


You want to talk about beautiful? Beautiful is a woman that can hold a deep and meaningful conversation with you, not informed by baseless opinions, but by experience and knowledge that speaks to a life that has been truly lived. Beautiful is a woman that can get her elbows dirty when the occasion calls for it, the same woman that when she chooses to be sexy, she’s not only a show-stopper, she is a trendsetter. Beautiful is a woman that is not afraid to say ‘No’ and be alone if it means not becoming the bed warmer of a man that is not fit to father her offspring. Beautiful is a woman that can do a lot with little – make a gourmet meal from meagre earnings; make dated clothes still look good; clean, cook, work, discipline and comfort with just two hands and make her man feel like a king even though he may live as a pauper. Beautiful is a woman that knows her words can be as powerful as her silence. Beautiful is a woman that is happy with her flaws, otherwise, she would be the perfect woman for every man!

Beautiful is who we are. It is a personal truth, not a societal standard. You are worth it and THAT is why you are beautiful.


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