Need I comment further? You won’t need to let him know that you’re hurting, he will feel it. You won’t need to prompt him to do little love gestures for you, it will come naturally. You won’t have to argue with him to care, that will be second nature. You won’t have to beg him to not hurt you – he will know better. Love will not need to give an account for whether or not it’s there. It will speak for itself through the way your partner treats you.
It’s comical how people will bite off more than they can chew yet blame everything and everyone else for the fact that they are struggling to cope. The same applies to relationships where everyone is looking for someone who has their shit together while many of these same people remain blind to the fact that their shit is constantly falling apart. You don’t ask for a woman who is established, stable, smart and beautiful to settle for broken promises, little ambition, no effort and weak ass attempts at romance. You don’t expect to have a man who is honest, respectful, intelligent and forward-thinking to be happy with a woman who will always start but never finish stuff, never plan for the future and is more interested in her wardrobe than she is about any relationship. To expect much yet give little is genuinely punching above your belt. You either drop to a person’s level or make it that they rise to yours. We all operate on different mental and spiritual wavelenghts as we go through life. So I guess the key is in finding someone who is vibing on the same frequency when it comes to matters of the heart and mind.
Don’t you just love life’s little surprises? Those unexpected situations that you find yourself in that make you marvel at how quickly things can change and change for the better? Or those interesting people that you stumble across that make a difference to what would otherwise be an ordinary day? Without any effort on your part, everything has just come together and all that is required of you is to just be in the moment and live.
One of my most favourite sayings is ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’ and when it comes to people, often the outward appearance does a poor job of reflecting who the person is and what they are capable of. I believe that the most beautiful thing is to be with someone who doesn’t cease to amaze you everyday. Just when you think that you’ve seen it all, they surprise you with some other silly, ridiculous yet eye-opening act that all you can think is ‘Wow, you’re incredible’. I believe we are all a gift wrapped package whose contents are waiting to be discovered and revealed by that special someone. On the surface we may appear average but underneath, we are simply one of a kind.
Before we were introduced to the world of relationships, friendships, situationships etc., all we knew was ourselves. As a child, there was such a wonderful fascination with the world around us that we were content with projecting our imagination on objects that appealed to our sensory needs. Our sense of touch, smell, sight, hearing and taste were slowly awakened as we delved into a world of novelty and mystery. Since that time, we’ve relished having these experiences alone, never once feeling obligated to explain to the world our reason for being happy yet single and never once fearing the idea of making new discoveries all by ourselves. As we’ve grown, our need for companionship has likewise increased but sometimes at the expense of neglecting our very first and most abiding friend – ourselves. Regardless of what people choose to believe, that friend never leaves us. Those nights when we are left to our own thoughts, those times that we are racked with uncertainty and misgivings, those secret moments when we cry ourselves to sleep, no one else witnesses this except your nearest and dearest – you. We came into this world alone and we shall leave this world alone. Make it so that you leave this life with your bestfriend and not a stranger.
There is no problem in loving others, just so long as you don’t love them at the expense of yourself, at the expense of your happiness and at the expense of your peace of mind. In life, the key to enjoyment and fulfilment is balance. No true love will ever require you to go against what you know is right and it will certainly not accept that you be less than yourself. Make the love you have for yourself be the benchmark for the kind of love you wish to receive from others. True love starts from you. What you accept for yourself is what you will attract from others.