The Love Novels, Books and Literature LIED
Yep. All those love stories about being swept off your feet by a dashing stallion that had long flowing hair, rugged features, a lean and toned figure, strong and powerful arms, firm and unflinching convictions and verifiable prowess in bed was really a stretch of the imagination compared to reality. In life, what we really contend with are men that are sometimes unkempt; unshaven and bedraggled appearances rather than rugged features; really fat or really skinny body types and even men with low self esteem which, unfortunately, affects their bedroom performance. Add to the fact that an increasing segment of the population is now embracing homosexuality, bisexuality, asexuality etc., our pool of men shrinks by the very second. Therefore, we are not necessarily led to sex by an attraction so fierce that our clothes magically becomes undone or a love so profound that we are swept away in a tide of blissful romance and copulation. No, sometimes it’s just because it is a welcome distraction.
Your first time is not promised to be spectacular
Those of you who are entertaining the idea of joining the ranks of ‘devirgined’ women based on the very biased and often, overrated, views of friends or the deception of porn or your overactive imagination – please, don’t expect much. As a matter of fact, the number of people who enjoyed their first time are rather small in comparison to the majority (a number that grows even smaller if you ignore those that were under the influence of some drug or stimulant at the time). At the very worst your partner, in his inexperience, will fumble with everything, poke the wrong orifice, get over-excited and finish before your clothing even hits the floor. At the other side of the spectrum, your partner may be so experienced that he will have your bedroom turned into an acrobatic or gymnastic arena. Imagine having to try every position and style conceivable as seen in porn and demonstrated through kama sutra, tantric sex, sadomasochism, dominatrix etc. This experience is just as bad since the whole ordeal will be just that – an ordeal.
You may avoid catching STIs/STDs but you can’t avoid catching feelings
Now this is the one that no one cares to elaborate or tell you about. Whilst you’ve done a fantastic job to ensure that you are protected from catching some incurable disease or embarrassing STI, no one tells you that there is nothing on the market to protect you from catching feelings. No one talks about pining after your love interest after the sexual encounter or waiting impatiently at the phone for a message or you perceiving every female in his vicinity as a personal competition or threat to your ‘supposed’ relationship or the misunderstandings attached to whether or not the sex is an automatic confirmation that you’re IN a relationship. No one prepares you for IF you discover that you are the side chick or for when he ignores you or for when he maligns your name in social media or for when he simply disappears. While you have a 99.9% guarantee of being physically protected from any unwanted virus when you use protection, you leave your heart and emotions exposed 100%. So how much peace of mind do you really have when you sleep with someone?
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