We Are A Walking Contradiction

Looking Natural

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We spend hundreds to thousands of dollars on high-end, superior quality makeup to achieve a natural look because our own ‘natural skin tone’ doesn’t meet the criteria.

 

Hair

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It’s now normal to pay money for something or somebody’s hair rather than to let the hair, growing out from our own scalp, see the light of day. It is also acceptable to pluck your eyebrows to the point that you stunt its regrowth so that you can have a blank ‘face’ canvas on which to redraw the same, damn thing.

 

Heartbreaks

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We know how devastating it is to have our hearts broken and the shame and humiliation that accompany the realization that you’ve been rejected. You would think that having first-hand experience of this, people would be more sympathetic in love. However, the victims become the perpetrators, expecting the warmth of love yet unfairly exchanging this for the disappointments, distrust and heartaches of the past. Hurt enough people and in time we will have a generation that is more adept at causing pain than showing love.

 

Love

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A man will be blind to the multitude of wrongs that his love interest commits but will snipe at even the smallest indiscretion of someone he doesn’t even remotely care about. Remember that the next time you try to find excuses for his lack of interest.

 

Bank Charges

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You have no money hence why you go into your overdraft. When you exceed your overdraft you are punished (for not having enough money) by being charged more in overdraft fees. Surely since we didn’t have the money for the overdraft to begin with, we’ll be able to find that and much more when additional fees are included, right? It’s basic economics.

 

Pretend  

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People pretend to be rich, pretend to be famous, pretend to be perfect, pretend to be knowledgeable, pretend to be special and pretend to be happy. Then they get upset when you stop pretending to care.

 

Internet Dating

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It’s unbelievable that there are so many atheists and agnostics in the world when there is still so much blind faith. There is faith that the profile picture online will actually be a true representation of the individual you will be meeting in person. There is faith that you will miraculously lose the excess weight and time will be reversed such that the former you, in your online pic, will appear when you meet the other person for the first time. There is faith that the person you’re communicating with is truly the established professional they say they are and not just a con-artist, pervert or serial killer. There is still faith that the online lies will become the truth and the reality  of a situation will become a lie. There is still faith…….

 

We Are Still Evolving

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Evolution is still in progress today, in front of our very own eyes. While technological advances are making devices smarter, people are simultaneously becoming lazier and dumber.

 

English Speakers

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How can we accuse foreigners for not doing a better job of learning English when we don’t even understand it ourselves? We hear the words but fail to listen, we read a text but struggle to understand the meaning and we speak to each other in perfect English yet still misunderstand what the other person is saying.

 

Voting

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How is it that something as simple as a vote can enable leaders to gain power but it takes disturbances, protests, public uproars, marches, petitions and other grand scale events to try and repeal policies or eject leaders from their seat of power?

 

Terrorism

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We get attacked by radicalized Muslims and lose loved ones and fellow citizens at the hands of suicide bombers. The old bury the young and people’s lives are extinguished at the height of their youth and vigour. We burn with hate, seethe with anger and seek retaliation. And how do we go about doing this? We attack Muslim mothers commuting to and from work, bully and isolate Muslim children at school, vandalise Muslim places of worship and businesses, verbally abuse Muslims in the streets and gang up on any Muslim that appears visibly vulnerable. The code of conduct in times like these is to vent our frustration and visit our retaliation not on the aggressors but on anyone else that remotely dresses and worships the same way. It would be interesting to see what the end result will be when the innocent is punished for the wrongdoing of others and the more neutral masses are held accountable for the actions of a handful. We shouldn’t be punished for the sins of our forefathers but they deserve to be punished for the terror committed by a select few. After all, whatever we do is in the name of justice. The same acts only become terror when done by men wearing turbans and women dressed in hijabs, right?



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Why I No Longer Vote

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I have long lost interest in voting for some years now and I know that this frank statement will be deemed downright appalling considering that voting was once a privilege reserved for a select few. I know all too well how much sacrifice, abuse, deprivation and discrimination people were subjected to as they struggled to attain the right to vote. Therefore, I am in no way trying to discredit or trivialize what was sacrificed to build the present that we enjoy today but the more I think about it, the more I realize that the whole process is almost a complete charade.

It has been several months since I had this conversation with a work colleague of mine, about voting, and she was incensed at the fact that people were throwing away such a crucial right to determine their destiny when all it took was a trip to the ballot boxes. As she spoke to me in animated tones and fervent arguments, I listened patiently hoping that she would present something new and novel about the usefulness of the whole affair (which I had somehow forgotten in my bid to distance myself from the polls). Unfortunately, she just regurgitated what I already knew (and too often heard) about making a difference, ensuring that the right candidate won, voting for policies that would affect our futures etc. Though true, my observation of politicians in the past and the knowledge I gained through my brief studies in politics shed light on the following factors that are far too often neglected:

Majority Vote

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It is the majority’s vote that makes a difference and NOT that of individual voters. This is blatantly obvious but what people neglect to realise is that the majority may not necessarily be analytical or worried about probing the grey areas in proposed policies or even particularly bothered about the future implications of choosing certain candidates. What happens too often is that people make decisions based on the face value of promises from politicians and the extent to which their checklist of wants and needs can be purportedly met by drafted policies. Add to this a candidate that is aesthetically appealing as well as thoroughly witty and charming and that’s pretty much it – he/she has the vote. There is also the issue of people voting for a particular party because, like seasoned football fans, that’s what previous generations have always done. Therefore, the whole process becomes one of tradition rather than one that is constantly subjected to rigor and analysis. So imagine the few that actually see through all the fluff and rubbish but unfortunately can only contend with the rest through a single unitary vote? This is NOT to say that opinions haven’t been divided or that elections have always been won through landslide victories but when you come across some of the reasons propelling people to vote, you can’t help but be discouraged when you see how many others share similarly short-sighted views.

What Freedom of Choice?

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Voting today is never really down to freedom of choice. In the Western World people’s minds are swayed by political propaganda, slander, fear-mongering and excellent PR campaigns. In other countries that are not as ‘democratic’, people are persuaded to vote through sustained but effective application of bribery, force, intimidation and/or brutality.

During electoral campaigns in the West, candidates of competing parties often look for ways to malign and sully the name of their competitors by unearthing as much scandal and controversy as possible. In this report in UK’s Daily Mirror (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/labour-accuses-david-cameron-dirty-5078300) there’s the quote:

“We don’t care what Labour do or say. We will continue our criticisms of Ed Miliband. It’s not about fighting dirty or clean. It’s all about winning the election. Nothing else matters.”

Then there’s the highly comical Youtube video that was made about the incumbent Prime Minister, David Cameron, during the run up to the last elections https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8iS8xQRpZo

Also, here is a video and article which speaks of America’s long tradition of ‘dirty politics’ stretching as far back as the time of their early forefathers http://www.cbsnews.com/news/nasty-campaign-ads-an-american-tradition/.

Currently, politics has taken on an even more skewed dimension where celebrity culture, sensationalism and theatrics are now mixed into one, with emphasis being on generating more publicity and media attention than creating sound policies and a respectable campaign. Donald Trump’s campaign provides the perfect example of the changing landscape of politics in America https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2DgwPG7mAA

When it comes to votes gained through intimidation, force, violence or bribery, you have a plethora of articles about this problem:

Guinea http://www.dw.com/en/guinea-heads-to-the-polls-amidst-fears-of-post-election-violence/a-18766581#

Ivory Coast http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/04/01/ivory-coast-showdown-inte_n_843843.html

Sri Lanka https://www.srilankacampaign.org/sri-lanka-election-violence-the-world-is-watching/

Jamaica http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/2325901.stm

 

So whereas in the past, voting was not a privilege available to all, now it may very well be available to everyone but takes place either under duress, manipulation or with the help of underhanded tactics to undermine the competition.

Politicians Lie

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Another reason why I do not vote is because politicians lie. This is partly the electorate’s fault because we insist on selecting candidates provided that they tell us what we want to hear. We loathe the truth. Nobody wants to be told that the government has to prioritise where its budget is allocated and nobody wants to suffer austerity measures or cuts to public services. Therefore, to even be considered, politicians are often times forced to make promises that they can’t keep. We only show ourselves tolerant of such harsh truths when the failings of the elected leader before is so abysmal and the lies, so blatant that anyone who represents change is a welcome sight. However, there are those politicians who lack scruples and will say and do anything to win a seat in parliament. To them, the election is a means to an end and there is no sense of altruism or service to others that is built into their psyche. Then again, we also have those well-meaning politicians that earnestly make promises, with every intention of keeping them. However, once in government and exposed to the bureaucratic processes and parliamentary quagmire of decision-making and policy approval, they are often forced to compromise in areas that were never up for discussion. This is the nature of politics.

Lack of Diversity

Eastern_Phoebe-nest-Brown-headed-Cowbird-eggIs it just me or isn’t it obvious that there’s a general lack of diversity in parliament? Take a look at this article about the composition of the Canadian parliament for example: http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/2015/01/02/parliaments_lack_of_diversity_goes_beyond_race_gender_study.html

Whereas we’ve come a far way by including more women in government, those who are representative of the minorities in the population are very few and in between. See also this article about the lack of diversity in the UK government: http://www.theguardian.com/politics/datablog/2014/jul/31/parliament-failing-represent-uk-diversity.

Now one can argue that more diversity within parliament doesn’t guarantee that such candidates will be any more effective at defending the rights of minorities as their white counterparts. Furthermore, even though candidates may be from an ethnic background, that doesn’t automatically mean that they are Presidential or Prime Minister material. Another argument could also be made that the reason why there is such lack of diversity is because politics is not high on the list of careers for ethnic minorities. While these statements offer some food for thought, one can also posit that with the less than sterling track record of some leaders that have come from more affluent, respectable or privileged backgrounds, taking a chance on a leader belonging to a minority is a gamble that we could live with. Furthermore, who is to say that the mindset of parliament and the budding institutions for future leaders and parliamentarians (that feed into government) don’t suffer from entrenched institutional discrimination, thus inhibiting the progress of potential candidates from ethnic backgrounds? Understandably, this is all speculation and will require a whole article altogether to really delve into these statements. However, it is undeniable that the lack of diversity in parliament can lead to government policies being severely one-sided and easily tunnel-visioned.

So as I said before, I haven’t been compelled to vote in a long time. Whereas many people around the world still face the risk of violence when choosing political candidates, in the West all eligible adults have the right to vote without being forced. However, this lack of force has been brilliantly substituted with manipulation which has effectively clouded the judgement of many voters and virtually reduced the whole process to a popularity contest.



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Black Lives Matter: If Only All Black People Agreed

 

I’m going to be honest, as a race we lost our way long before the ‘white supremacists’, ‘European bigots’, ‘red necks’ and ‘racist clans’ launched concerted and random attacks against us, our families and our children. Given the recent spate of police violence towards Black people in America, everyone is up in arms and insisting that the police, government, established institutions etc. should start recognising Blacks as fellow human beings. Though noble, this message is misdirected. It’s not OTHERS that should start recognising our worth, it is WE who need to start recognising that our lives matter. You think this is irrelevant? Let me highlight some problems that we have but take for granted:

  1. Lack of Unity

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It is hard to penetrate the ranks of a unified stronghold the same way that a united group is far more difficult to subjugate than a single individual. Unfortunately, we have nurtured divisions among us from as far back as the time of our ancestors. Not only has this given the Western world a jump start in progress and development (all on the backs of our sweat and tears) but our own division has also set us back. This is despite the fact that we have proven time and again that we have the potential to not only prosper but thrive. Take the slave trade for example. For many years, our history lessons in the Caribbean was littered with horrific stories, gruelling pictures and harrowing accounts of how Africans were viciously torn away from their families, forcefully captured, inhumanly transported across the treacherous Atlantic and thereafter doomed to a life of torture, abuse, squalor and ultimately, death. However, there was very little account (or room for analysis) of how much Africans themselves contributed to this whole affair. The Europeans didn’t just arrive in Africa with the fore-knowledge of how to negotiate the continent’s difficult terrain and neither did they automatically know which pockets of communities were weakest therefore easiest to target. Their cultural and local language awareness was pretty much non-existent and like the Caribbean, it’s hard to believe that they could have survived the harsher environments of the continent without help. So there is no doubt that Africans were accomplices in this lucrative Trans-Atlantic Slave trade.

African Chiefs Urged to Apologise for the Slave Trade http://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/nov/18/africans-apologise-slave-trade

Argument Against Africans’ Contribution to the Slave Trade http://www.asante.net/articles/44/afrocentricity/

Historical Eye Witness Account of Africans’ help in the Slave Trade http://www.eyewitnesstohistory.com/slavetrade.htm

Even if that can be forgiven, what is unforgivable is the fact that even when we have a hand in our own demise, we always manage to benefit the least because we are often short-sighted. The African slave traders thought short term when they traded their fellow brothers and sisters for European wares and currency. Their paltry profit stands in stark contrast to the huge benefits that the Europeans gained from what pretty much propelled their economies to be the superpowers and first world countries that they are today (How Slavery Helped Build A World Economy  http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2003/01/0131_030203_jubilee2.html). This problem of ‘selling out’, ‘selfishness’ and ‘self-preservation’ has been the hallmark of our race. Look at the following examples which mainly highlights Jamaica as a case in point:

Tourism industries in the Caribbean benefiting foreign companies most http://www.sivglobal.org/?read=185

Jamaica’s IMF and World Bank debt affects its people’s social welfare http://www.theguardian.com/global-development/poverty-matters/2013/apr/16/jamaica-decades-debt-damaging-future

Two-sides of the argument for Britain’s repatriation of Nigerian, Somaliland, Jamaican etc. criminals back to their home country while sweetening the deal with so-called ‘monetary aid’

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2015/sep/30/uk-to-repatriate-hundreds-of-jamaican-prisoners

https://www.facebook.com/thebellablair/videos/427499800789602/

Multinational companies and the harms they cause to local economies (including that of Black majority countries) http://www.laborrights.org/in-the-news/14-worst-corporate-evildoers

Outside of personal gains and successes, we fail to progress on a larger scale because we fail to see the bigger picture. Therefore, if Black lives mattered, then at the very least, our leaders, representatives and compatriots should act as such.

  1. We Don’t Even Consider Ourselves Beautiful

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I recently wrote the article ‘I’m Not Beautiful But I’m Worth It’ (https://technotecky.wordpress.com/2015/11/01/im-not-beautiful-but-im-worth-it/) because from a very early stage I was fed a preconceived notion that beauty involved having long soft hair, fair skin, a slender body and pretty-coloured eyes. As if that wasn’t bad enough, it was the parents, grandparents and potential boyfriends and husbands in my society that fuelled this nonsense and embraced it as an ‘ideal’. Had I not acquired true self-awareness in time, I would have probably resorted to bleaching my skin (See video about this growing problem https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1y-a87ClNW0). I would have also continued to break my hair through harsh processing and unhealthy hairstyles and would have even approached my adulthood with a sense of being unworthy of the same respect and attention as my fair-skinned counterparts. You say Black lives matter? Then why are Black parents and grandparents reinforcing the stereotype that being ‘light-skinned’ and ‘white’ is synonymous to beauty and worth? Why do the Black men in our lives choose to remind us that we are a ‘downgrade’ when it comes to mate selection while the light-skinned woman is crème-de-la-crème? Why do Black women turn up their noses at a sista that chooses to rock her natural beauty yet are happy to fund a multi-billion dollar industry (which we don’t even own by the way) through routine purchases of fake hair, weaves and extensions? Why do we even need fake hair and makeup to feel beautiful? You cannot parade around the streets showing yourself to be an avid advocate of the campaign ‘Black Lives Matter’ when your kids have no true sense of self-worth, when you fear embracing your own natural uniqueness and beauty, when you happily speak ill of another Black individual on account of the shade of their skin or physical features and when you don’t even value yourself enough to wait for someone who is worth your time and will treat your right. You can’t demand that people see you or your fellowman as valuable when you don’t even believe that yourself.

  1. Culture of Baby Fathers and Single Mothers

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Black men have gained notoriety when it comes to cheating and being unfaithful. In fact, this habit is so prominent that many stupidly wear the label of ‘cheater’ and ‘womaniser’ as a badge of honour. Now Black women are partly to blame for this habit because they have either tacitly accepted that all men will cheat or they have happily embraced the role of the ‘side chick’. That is another issue altogether that I know will make for a lively debate. However, my focus is on our Black men. Again, we say Black lives matter? Then why is it easy for these men to walk away from the off-springs that they have fathered? How do they expect their children to fare in this cruel and cold world? Who do they expect to raise them? If you can’t even value your child that holds the seeds of tomorrow and carries your legacy within their very DNA, how can you expect others to suddenly see them as valuable? Abandoning your child is akin to casting your pearls to swine yet in the face of police brutality and discrimination, you wish to fly the banner of justice and human rights? What is human about leaving your child with an uncertain future when they didn’t ask to be born? How is it justified to wantonly flit from bed to bed, spreading your seed without any careful consideration as to the kind of individual your resultant offspring will become? If the system is built to stifle Black progress and inhibit Black success, how is adding a string of ‘fatherless’ children a way of alleviating the problem? People will insist that the police is against us, the State is craftily conniving to blight our future, the economy is built to inhibit our success and it is all a conspiracy against the Black race. I will say this, if this is all true then we are doing a brilliant job of adding to our own demise. If it isn’t, we have done an even more superb job of being our own worst enemy. Our race is resilient, feisty and resourceful. If we have been unable to relinquish the chains of poverty and discrimination, it’s simply because we continue to custom make and build these very chains that we happily yoke ourselves with.

BLACK LIVES WILL START TO MATTER WHEN WE START TO LIVE LIKE IT DOES.



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I Am My Own Palm Reader: This Is My Future

Instead of finding a palm reader or fortune teller to tell me what I want to hear or offer some glimpse of hope into my future, I’d rather focus on achieving what’s in my control and pray about the rest. I am my own palm reader and this is my future:

Meet The Man Of My Dreams

I’m going to meet the man of my dreams and our relationship will be as explosive as it is loving. We will be as crazy about each other as we are about life. We will be today’s version of the A Team where we’ll stand united against life’s challenges. He will be my King and I will be his Queen. He will be my rock and I will be his comfort. We will know each other’s weaknesses and not exploit them to our advantage but like pieces of a puzzle, he’ll match my weakness with his strength and I will greet his shortcomings with love.

My Kids

My kids will be beautiful. They will not only have soundness of mind but strength of character. They will be healthy, happy and enjoy their youth. While there is still breath in my body they will want for nothing and they will not be short of love. They will be a credit to their family and a blessing to this world, standing immovable and steadfast in the face of calamity, difficulty, heartbreak and pain.

Imma Get This Money

I will not live a life from pay check to pay check, caught up in the uncertainty of my future every time another recession hits or subjected to the whims of managers who are happy to claim the leadership title but quick to relinquish the work to others. As I sleep, my bank account will have money flowing in and as I vacation, funds will automatically be amassing to pay for the next one. I will be a mover and shaker in my field and I will not only excel at what I do but I will also become a pioneer in how I do it.

I Will Be Happy

I will be happy. My days of contentment, happiness and even euphoria will exceed those days of anxiety, doubt and pain. Every day that I wake, I will see a reason to give thanks and my spirit will be humbled by the sheer knowledge that I have been blessed with basic comforts and people who love and care for me. I will be content with little the same way that I am content with much and I will appreciate the people that matter and release the people that don’t. My memory will do well to keep a mental archive of all those moments which brought happiness and automatically delete and discard the rest. I will remain positive and hopeful and not bitter and resentful. I will love life and I will enjoy it.

I don’t need a fortune teller to tell me this. All I need is time and all I desire is to live long enough to witness it.



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2014 – 2015: The Movies You Should Have Watched

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I have always been a fan of movies, for as long as I can remember, and once I became an adult I started to properly indulge in my most favourite hobby. With a cinema membership card in one hand and ‘all the movies you can watch’ privilege in another, I managed to come across the following fantastic films:

The Imitation Game

The name, Beneditch Cumberbatch, became almost synonymous with the hit series, Sherlock Holmes, which I never truly managed to become an avid fan of. That is not a reflection on the quality and entertainment value of the series itself but just simply because my spare time was occupied with watching other series like American Horror Story, True Blood, Being Mary Jane, Banshee, Empire etc. However, when I saw the trailer for the movie, Imitation Game, I wanted to see why there was such a big fuss about this actor. This movie was fantastic and I give special credit to Beneditch Cumberbatch and actress, Keira Knightley, who managed to transform their script into this riveting and compelling film. On the surface, the movie appears to be centred around the seemingly impossible task of breaking a highly complex and intuitive German code called Enigma. True to its name, this code was a mystery and managed to frustrate and confuse even the most brilliant minds, except one. What is compelling about the film is that the process of breaking the code serves only as a backdrop to the real focus of the movie which is the protagonist’s own personal secret – a secret he manages to cleverly (and even theatrically) hide. The blatant arrogance, lack of tact and awkwardness that Beneditch Cumberbatch masterfully portrays in the film added to the movie’s charm and pull. This is truly a film to see.

Magic Mike XXL

Now this film is the truth! I watched the first film, Magic Mike, and found it to be cute but I was immediately fascinated by Channing Tatum. Therefore, when Magic Mike XXL was released I didn’t even think twice about watching it. Now the start of the film was very modest and I was actually very disappointed by it. The reason was because the protagonist was no longer a stripper but was rather working as an entrepreneur in his own furniture business and pretty much living life like any ordinary individual. Curiously, his love interest from the previous film was also nowhere to be found. However, the latter half of the film compensated for the lacklustre start. The film started to become interesting once the protagonist’s previous male stripper colleagues decided to pay him a visit on their way to the infamous Stripper Dance Convention. A bit of the old Mike comes back to life in the scene where he is working in his garage and the song ‘Pony’ comes on the radio. This man was whining, grinding and rhythmically gyrating on that worktable that he had me in the cinema secretly saying ‘Hallelujah’ and ‘Thank you Lord’. However, THAT was just a tip of the ice berg. The scene with Jada Pinkett and the actual Stripper Convention was undoubtedly the highlight of the movie. Channing Tatum really outdid himself and had me (and all the other ladies in the cinema) melting in our seats. I actually felt sorry for the men that tagged along. Even if they attempted to do the same once they got back home, I can tell you that Channing Tatum’s moves would be a hard act to follow. Joe Manganiello, the actor that plays the role of a wolf in True Blood, is also another one to look out for. He did his role justice near the end of the movie. For me, this film has gone down in the annals of movie history as the baddest male stripper movie to date. Go ahead, see for yourself. I dear you to prove me wrong!

Crimson Peak [2015]

This movie was masterfully enacted and skilfully directed, incorporating all the elements you would find across different genres – horror, suspense, thriller, drama and romance. However, the strength of the film lies in its shock factor. In essence, a girl’s mother warns her, in a ghastly ghost silhouette, that she should stay away from Crimson Peak. Once the girl is mature, the very man that she falls in love with so happens to live in Crimson Peak (which is discovered long after the fact). However, along the way there is the shock of how the father for this woman is murdered, the shock factor surrounding the terrible condition of her lover’s (eventually husband’s) house, the shock behind the reasons why there are strange and blood-chilling ghosts that come out at nights but (even more so) the shock of the horrid secret between the husband and his sister who, from the very beginning, does a brilliant job of embracing the role of a cold and icy bitch. The abhorrent secrets and heinous acts were so mind-blowing that even long after the film, I was still rehashing the fictional events in my mind. This movie was not only gripping, it was also jaw-dropping. You have to see it for yourself to believe it. (Side note: Tom Hiddleston is absolutely gorgeous).

American Sniper

Bradley Cooper stars in this Clint Eastwood film which is not only a potential tear-jerker but also based on a true story. The tone of the movie is set by a conversation that the protagonist remembers as a child where his father spoke about sheep, wolves and shepherd dogs. The sheep was an analogy for people who were followers. Wolves referred to those people whose sole purpose was to wreak havoc and destruction while shepherd dogs were seen as protectors of the weak. The protagonist, in his role as an American sniper, inadvertently exhibits the traits of a ‘shepherd dog’ by providing protection to his troops from roof tops. This film was fantastic because it made you examine issues such as child soldiers and the disease, PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), which soldiers often suffer after fighting wars. Bradley Cooper played a very convincing role in this movie and did well to pay tribute to the memory of the soldier, Chris Kyle, who is classed as America’s most lethal sniper in US military history.

Legend [2015]

First of all, let me make it clear that Tom Hardy is a work of art. This man was so sleek, handsome and fierce in this film that he had me melting in my seat. Now about the movie – this film was so crazy that it was superb. Tom Hardy had the unenviable role of playing himself twice in this film in his portrayal of the true story behind the Kray twins. These twins were the closest London ever got to having a mafia and they controlled both a lucrative business and formidable criminal network. Now the sheer fact that Tom Hardy was able to maintain the individuality and uniqueness of both characters was not only undoubtedly difficult but highly impressive. This is evident throughout the film but especially during the fight scene between the twins. The film had you cracking up with stitches the same way it had you in shock and amazement. As flawed, morally bankrupt and rough as the twins were, you couldn’t help but feel saddened by their ultimate fate in the end. I absolutely enjoyed this film and I’m pretty sure you would too.

Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials

I have watched Mocking Jay and I have watched the first Maze Runner and I must say that I prefer the latter. The first movie, Maze Runner, was absolutely brilliant. It was action packed, full of suspense and did well to capture all the raw human emotions that naturally arise from being held in captivity while fighting for survival. Maze Runner – The Scorch Trials, was no different. At the start I was lulled into a false sense of security that the protagonist and his friends had finally escaped this tyrannical woman that was experimenting on survivors to find a drug for a deadly disease called ‘the flare’. It soon became evident that the protagonist was right in the lion’s den but he discovers this just in time to make a narrow escape with his friends. On the outside, however, they face a whole host of other dangers such as zombies, mercenaries, cataclysmic weather and even death at the hands of the very rebellion they are seeking to join. The film also has its fair share of betrayal, death and sacrifice all thrown into the plot. It is a really good watch. Most importantly, there is a very strong possibility that there will be a third part to this movie. Therefore, don’t delay. Start catching up on the first two!

Fast and the Furious 7

If you thought that the preview showed pretty much all the good stuff in this movie, think again. I didn’t realise how intense this film was until I saw the imprints of my fingernails in the handles of my seat once I loosened my grip at the end of the film. This movie is worth its weight in gold. The film’s visual effects was flawless, the storyline – clear, the jokes – corny but cute and the emotions – real. The line up of actors was also impressive with the likes of The Rock (Dwayne Johnson), Tyrese Gibson, Ludacris (Chris Bridges), Jason Statham and Vin Diesel. The fight scenes and the escapade in Dubai are both thrilling and mind-blowing. The ending is also extremely touching and the film director managed to do a wonderful job of completing the movie despite the death of Paul Walker. The film’s moving conclusion combined with the absolutely brilliant soundtrack ‘See You Again’ formed the perfect tribute to Paul Walker’s memory. Believe me when I say, this movie will not disappoint.



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What They Didn’t Tell You About Sex – PART 2

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It will NOT be mind-blowing every time

Let’s say that you’re in a long term, steady relationship. You have no doubts about being in love with your partner and your connection with him, on a physical and mental level, is so organic that you are as close as it gets to being a match made in heaven. Despite your ups and downs you’re in it for the long haul. These are optimal conditions for a decent sex life, right? That doesn’t mean that every day you will be hitting cloud 9 or that you will have a sustained, mind-blowing sex life throughout the relationship. Be prepared for unknowingly getting into the routine of ‘doing it’ just because it’s what lovers do. As you become more accustomed to each other, your encounters in the bedroom will often be quick, unimaginative, uncreative and just borderline – pleasant. If you have children, you’d be fortunate the number of times you can have such encounters…………… per month. It’s not the end of the world but knowing this will help you manage expectations.

Sex cannot keep a man

Now I will give props to those women that have their game on point. When it comes to being a lady in the streets but a freak in the bed, you balance both sides of the coin beautifully. You may even have your man wondering how he was so lucky to land himself a ‘refined vixen’ as yourself. However, all the reality TV shows, celebrity gossip and real life scandals are testament to the fact that your stellar bedroom performance isn’t insurance against your man cheating or completely walking away from the relationship. Why, you may ask? It’s because while making love will last from a couple minutes to maybe (if you’re lucky) a few hours, for the remainder of the day, he has to be able to live with you or, at the very least, like your company. As for those men who are just chronic philanderers, regardless of what you do, his infidelity will always be a recurrent problem because that is what he is BENT ON DOING. You cannot change a person anymore than you can predict how long your relationship will last. This brings me to my next point.

Great sex is not the secret behind why a relationship lasts

Whoever credits their relationship’s survival to great sex is severely short-sighted, completely oblivious, putting up an intriguing facade or clearly lying. First of all, even if we may strive for the ideal of great sex always, this is clearly unattainable because we have other life issues to contend with. Furthermore, if you are lucky to do the impossible, great sex is still NOT so powerful an incentive that a cheater will be made faithful and a relationship – made whole. Great sex is not the source of happiness but it is likely to be the by-product of it. It is not love but a form of expressing it. When you need a shoulder to cry on or someone to hold the fort when you’re at your weakest, your strong tower and shield isn’t found between the sheets. A role model for your kids is not situated in the appendage swinging between your man’s legs. Your bills are not paid through your man’s impressive pelvis actions. Your household duties are not done with the help of bedroom antics and the foundations upon which a strong relationship is built does not rest in your earnest moans, groans and sexual rendezvous. Like everything else in this life, really solid relationships take hard work. Why do you think they say you should choose your partner wisely? If the animals do a decent job of choosing more resilient mates through just pure instincts, why can’t we do an even better job at the same task when we were born with both that and common sense?

Your partner is not responsible for your enjoyment of sex

You need to take personal responsibility for how much you enjoy sex. There is no unwritten rule to say that your partner, fling, one night stand etc. is required to make you happy while having sex. Moreover, no man is naturally gifted with the power to stroke you to the point of madness or make you quiver beyond control or have you ride on waves of unending orgasms. Even the person you love will have to learn how to make your body respond in kind. You are giving up a very precious gift during sex and that’s your body. If you are offering such an invaluable treasure, the least you can do is have sex on your terms and make it worth your while. Now with this in mind, you can’t just demand to be loved right because your partner is not Burger King where you can ‘Have it your way’. No, you need to have a bit of finesse about the whole affair but most importantly, you need to understand your body and know what you want. If he’s an attentive and understanding partner then that makes your job ten times easier. If he’s a bull in heat who has no regards for anyone except his own personal desire to be sexually satiated, you have no business with someone like that in bed nor in your life. Broaching the subject and giving cues in bed is not as embarrassing as personally not even having a clue as to what you find sexually satisfying. You will not learn that from the melodramatic actors in porn or hushed whispers from housewives or brash stories from friends. That requires a journey of self-discovery. Take the time to learn from yourself. Once you’ve learnt this much, put your knowledge to good use. I presume that you at least have a couple of years before arthritis, bad eyesight, high blood pressure and heart disease kicks in. Make good use of your time while you’re still pliable and limber.

This concludes Part 2 of this article. Hope it was a good read. Again, please like, comment and subscribe!

Special shout out to Sal, Pratyushbat and Spiritsunshine who took the time to subscribe to my blog. I appreciate it 😉



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